This Shameful Burden

by Altars of Grief

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Altars of Grief's debut album "This Shameful Burden" 2018 re-release edition in a 6 panel digipack with updated artwork and two bonus tracks! Comes with an Altars of Grief sticker.

    Includes unlimited streaming of This Shameful Burden via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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about

Prior to the release of “Iris”, prairie doom metal band Altars of Grief had already emerged on the Western Canadian doom metal scene with the release of their debut album “This Shameful Burden” in the summer of 2014, followed by a 10” vinyl split album “Of Ash and Dying Light” in the summer of 2015.

Originally self-released by the band, “This Shameful Burden” has been out of print for years, and alas it is finally time for this piece of Altars of Grief’s history to be made available once again. The 2018 edition of “This Shameful Burden” has been updated for a 6 panel digipack with an entirely different layout and design featuring artwork and photography from Necrographix, Wa’guna Wirya’wan, and Josh Langham to go alongside Sam Nelson’s original cover art. Bonus tracks from the “Of Ash and Dying Light” split, previously only available on vinyl, is also included on this release. Recorded by Justin Bender at Blue Door Recording in Regina, SK in April and November 2014.

Limited to 300 copies.
Available June 16, 2018
Taking pre-orders now.

credits

released June 14, 2018

This Shameful Burden was recorded by Justin Bender at Blue Door Recording in Regina, SK in April 2014 and was originally released on August 6th, 2014.

Damian Smith - Vocals, Piano (on track 6)
Evan Paulson - Guitar, Programming
Donny Pinay - Bass
Zack Bellina - Drums

Lyrics by Damian Smith

Music by Evan Paulson & Altars of Grief (except for track 6, written by Damian Smith)

Guest vocals on “In Your Arms, In Ruin” and “The Plague That Haunts The Darkness” by Erik Labossiere

Cover art by Sam Nelson
CD Image art by Necrographix

“In Dying Light” and “Your Heaven” originally appeared on Of Ash And Dying Light, a split release with Nachtterror. Of Ash And Dying Light was recorded by Justin Bender at Blue Door Recording in Regina, SK in November 2014 and was released on July 10, 2015.

Damian Smith - Vocals
Evan Paulson - Guitar, Programming, Backing Vocals
Erik Labossiere - Guitar, Vocals
Donny Pinay - Bass, Backing Vocals
Zack Bellina - Drums

Lyrics by Damian Smith
Music by Evan Paulson & Altars of Grief

Original cover art by Sam Nelson


***

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Hypnotic Dirge Records Saskatoon, Saskatchewan

Hypnotic Dirge Records is an independent record label and webshop based in Saskatoon, Canada active since 2008. Our intention and raison d'être is to release quality expressive and eclectic art through aural manifestations.

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Track Name: This Shameful Burden
A dim light peers in
Illuminating
The bruises that you hide
I've chosen not to see
You crawl to me
Eyes bearing distant fire
I feel my world collapse with every exhale

Your skin is cold
Scarred, but perfect
This shameful burden
Is mine alone
Your stare burns right through me
Revealing every lie
Your fragile beauty hides such a callous smile

What have I become?
Entombed within myself
The wreckage of our hearts
Is tearing me down

As you stand before me
I see what we've become
The wreckage of our hearts
And all the lies undone
A dim light peers in
Illuminating
My hands around your throat
This burden is mine alone

What have I become?
Entombed within myself
The wreckage of our hearts
Is forcing me...

The light is fading
The walls are closing in
This burden is mine alone
Your stare burns right through me
Until your dying breath
This shameful burden is mine alone
Track Name: Only Our Scars
Far...
Far from here is all you said
There is nothing left inside
Nothing left alive
There is no fucking hope

I sit and stare
As these grey walls close in
Endlessly suffer
To merely exist

There is nothing else here
But, lost words left to decay
As another grain falls
We latch on desperately
All of our dreams, all we hold dear
It all goes away
We carry only our scars
Alone, to our graves

In our most broken days
Will we find the strength to stand?
Or take the path of finality
To lay beneath the altars of our grief

I sit and stare
As these grey walls close in
Endlessly suffer
To merely exist
Track Name: In Your Arms, In Ruin
You arrive with grace
To quell the distance
Pull me into your ethereal skin
In your arms the world will fall away

As if I alone could carry this weight

In your eyes
I burn in my reflection
You move through my veins
And light the cold, endless night

Sightless, I cry out for you to carry me back

In your eyes
I burn in my reflection
In your arms
I stand alone in ruin

Amidst the ashes of my thoughts
And the silence of my decay

I alone cannot bear the weight of my own imminent collapse

I alone cannot bear the weight of my own failure
Track Name: The Plague that Haunts the Darkness
I hide my body away from the day
Flesh and bone scattered on the frozen wind
Desperate to hold every piece in place
As the sunlight consumes me

Awoken by a voice
Scraping at my skin
A storm of hunger and ecstasy
Awaiting the nights cold embrace
The moon hangs silent, shrouded in mist
Carrier of pestilence, harbinger of dread
I arrive in a haze of bloody delirium
I am the plague that haunts the darkness

Into the vastness of the abyss
Free from the weight of your suffering
Swallowed up by my hatred and the blood-stained earth
The silence is broken
Crawl out from the void
That has stripped you of your faith
Your god has abandoned you, my child
In blackness, forever
Never again!
Never again to feel the sun
Cursed to exist in isolation
A deathless disgrace
Within your loathsome tomb
In the throes of solitude
Withered from famine
This night, gods children will suffer

She lay still
Naked in death, for all to behold
When all hope disappears
The light won't find her here

Awoken by a voice
Scraping at my skin
A storm of hunger and ecstasy
Awaiting the nights cold embrace
The moon hangs silent, Shrouded in mist
Carrier of pestilence, harbinger of dread
I arrive in a haze of bloody delirium
I am the plague that haunts the darkness
Track Name: Her Shadow is the Night
Your death-white face haunts me still
In these endless nights where no dreams dwell
Held down beneath the surface, I watched the light leave your eyes
Fading, further down, into the gloom

I will drown in my grief, as you did
In these deathless nights my torment brings
I have lost my faith in these cold skies above
What god could ever forgive what I've done to you?

I am disgraced
Broken and wretched
Unable to face
What I have become
Hours in silence
Pry open old wounds

Her breathless body
Pale flesh
In the depths of a memory
Where she met with death
Please help me, oh lord
Help me carry this weight
I see her face when I close my eyes
Her shadow is the night
Please god, don't leave me
Don't leave me alone
Cold, dead hands
Pry open old wounds
The blackness buries me
As time depletes
Oh god, what have I done?
What have I done?
Track Name: In Dying Light [Bonus Track]
Open yourself to me
Consumed by my misery
Your blackened wings unfurled
And the ashes fell like snow
The ghosts that reside in this place
A reminder of the life that we shared
In you, I saw reflections of a cold, winter day
Where the sun refused to shine

These years have stolen everything from me
But, time can not claim your memory

Time can't take your memory from me

In dying light
I'll carry this weight
In dying light
I'll see your ghost again

The future holds nothing for me
Trapped in the darkness, alone
Tired eyes, cursed to wake to another day
Slipping further down into despair
Track Name: Your Heaven [Bonus Track]
Without your voice I am sightless and alone
Haunted by the memories of a place I once called home
Shadows force their way inside and paint depictions of my grief
I lament for providence but my faith abandons me
Growing cold with every hour of this endless night
The broken wings that expand behind me are incapable of flight

Mired deep within my sullen ruin
Amidst the dust and bereft of your light
Divine hands that crafted your wings
Bind me, hopeless, to my despair
The sands of time, for me, shall fall no longer
This growing darkness I can not escape
Desperate prayers have gone unanswered
I know your Heaven was never in reach

At last, the rain did cease
And a thunderous silence beset me
Grey skies give way
To an aching clarity
You're no longer here
But, I can't forget your face
I need to feel something real
The caress of cold steel
Metallic taste on my tongue
My hands are shaking
But, my senses are numb
I need to feel your pain
I need to know your Heaven is real

Beneath my own heartbeat
And heavy breath
There is no sound
But, that of time fading away
In these final moments
We are truly alone
Until the silence takes us away
Away from this life
Away from this life

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